Ah... the loo. The one isolated spot you're unlikely to be disturbed while you gather your thoughts, catch up on some reading and, if you're a guy, play games using your wee stream.
Wait, what?
Yes, you did read that right, and no, it wasn't a typo.
British company Captive Media has given men something to occupy their time while using public urinals, and something to distract wondering eyes (no more looking down and to the right for you, sir).
The interactive system is positioned at eye level above urinals in public restrooms. When the urinals are not in use, the system displays advertisements. When a gent approaches a urinal, the system senses his movements and switches to game mode, allowing men to choose which game they would like to play, even encouraging them to beat their friends' high scores and share those scores on social media.
According to PMzone, men can control the system by directing their stream to either the left or the right. In a demonstration video, men assume the role of a snow skier and have to control their journey down the slope by aiming to the left to turn left, and to the right to turn right. Brits interviewed for the promo video were delighted, with one even offering to invest in the project.
Am I the only one seeing the problem here?
The problem with toilet apps is that they encourage people to take their phones into the bathrooms with them, something I would expect technology advances to do away with.
My husband once told me that if there was a dead fly in a urinal, there is probably not one man on Earth who would not aim for it. The difference with aiming at a fly, however, is that you would actually have to look inside the bowl to point the stream at the target. But imagine, if you will, a bunch of men concentrating on a screen in front of them rather than on where they are aiming... now imagine a bunch of drunken men doing the same... I foresee many pissed off (bad pun shamelessly intended) bathroom cleaners. The words "drunk" and "co-ordination" are just not compatible in the same sentence.
Now, I'm all for toilet tech - the useful, hygienic kind - like those self-cleaning toilets in Europe. Genius!
I am even quite partial to the face-recognising iHouse SmartFaucet. I like the fact that it can recognise my face and adjust the water temperature to just the way I like it. I'm not so sure I would access my e-mail and calendar or check weather reports - the tap's other functions - however. There's a fine line when it comes to bathroom tech, one separating the useful from the absurd.
One example of the latter is the Eco Oto iPhone/iPad/iPod app, which is ideal for shy toilet users, although, to be honest, I'd be more embarrassed using the app while trying to mask my, erm, sounds (yes, that's really its function) than possibly being overheard in the cubicle. But for those with issues, having an app that mimics a running tap or a flushing toilet may come in handy during their next visit to a public restroom.
The problem with toilet apps is that they encourage people to take their phones into the bathrooms with them, something I would expect technology advances to do away with. Is it really necessary to be connected all the time? Will we miss out on the discovery of life on another planet simply because we left our phones in another room for a few minutes? Not likely.
The pervasiveness of technology means privacy is a privilege... and we only have ourselves to blame. The dog-eared book of Sudoku puzzles and the months-old edition of a celebrity magazine (what are these "magazines" you speak of?) are simply not entertaining enough.
And while we're drawing the line between practical and outrageous bathroom technology, where do we draw the line separating our (very) personal and public lives?
I hear there's a video version of Instagram in the works. My Instagram newsfeed often has images of girls bathing... Please, sweet Instagramers, please leave your phones in another room when using the loo if you plan on joining the Vine social network. We know you'll be bored, and we know you'll be tempted, but there are some things people just don't care to see.
The reality is, the more we embrace technology, the more we have to cling to our diminishing dignity, and all it takes to shatter that dignity completely is one six-second Vine clip.
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